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You and your boo are out enjoying an evening walk through the park. Walking and talking about life, family, your job, and even your friends 4th of July cookout that you guys attended together where his uncle had too much to drink and showed out. The feelings that are inside you now are nothing short of amazing. Everything just looks and feels so right. The chemistry is there. The bond seems unbreakable. Overall you both seem to currently be in a happy place right now. That is until you guys are approached by an older couple, a husband and wife. This couple assumes that you guys are boyfriend and girlfriend and go on to give you guys compliments about how good you both look together. Reality slowly starts to appear. Neither of you stopped them from assuming that yall were together. Basically, just went with the flow. Why is that??? Ohhhh it’s because when it comes down to it, YOU BOTH ARE SINGLE. And who wants to go through the awkwardness of trying to explain what their status is to people let alone complete strangers and risk sounding and looking like a fool? Nobody that’s who. No matter how cute you both look together, no matter if you have met each other’s family and friends, no matter how many out of town trips the two of you have taken together, you both are still single. That happy place you guys were just at 2 minutes ago…. gone!! Reality is back with a vengeance. Time to call it what it is…you two are in a “situationship”
According to urbandictionary.com the definition of a situationship is as follows
situationship: A relationship that has no label on it... like a friendship but more than a friendship but not quite a relationship.
We all have been in situationships at some point or another in life (You’re lying if you say you haven’t…you have you just didn’t know it at the time or you were in denial). You know the drill…meet someone new, start kicking it with them heavy, feelings get caught, and before you know it yall are officially an unofficial couple…classic situationship. It really isn’t hard to tell but for those of you that are unsure about if you are in one or not, here are a few ways to tell. First off, yall never talk about a future together or when any talks about a future is mentioned, one of you changes the subject entirely. Second, yall never talk on the phone. Everything is text, text, and more texting. Third and not least, more and more these days you’ve found yourself saying things like “a bond is more important than a title” although prior to you meeting and kicking it with this person you were big on titles and commitment.
Well Eventually one of you comes to your senses and realize that although it does feel good having companionship, none of it matters or feels genuine without a title and commitment to go with it. This is on your mind heavy in part because you’ve been down this road before and it didn’t work in your favor and because you are getting older and don’t really care to waste any more time at this point in your life. You decide this should be discussed and brought to your boo’s attention. “So, where are we going with this?” you ask them. Such a simple question yet it always gets the most complex responses from people who aren’t ready to commit. Any answer short of “I want to be with you and you only” or something along those line…. CUT THEM OFF!! THEY ARE PLAYING GAMES! Cutting some people off may not be as easy as it sounds due to the fact that some people, although they don’t want a relationship with you, they don’t want you to move on either so take that for what it’s worth.
Look I know how easy it is to get blinded and fall into that situationship trap. It’s so refreshing and comfortable but keep in mind it isn’t real. Know your worth ladies and gentlemen. If they beat around the bush when you press them about a relationship then they clearly don’t want a relationship, and there is nothing wrong with that. They just will have to pick up and have a situationship with someone that allows it.
-Chillin N Livin